It is okay to be angry with our deceased loved ones. As soon as we lose someone, we begin to forget any imperfections that they had, any disagreements we had, any flaws in our relationship. They become perfect in all ways in our memories, because we want to remember them well. This is perfectly normal....

This weekend is Independence Day. We celebrate the fact that we are a free people. And we recognize that our freedom was hard won by those willing and able to offer up their lives in the cause of freedom. In light of Covid 19, our freedom celebrations may look a little or a lot different...

When we lose a precious person from our lives, we lose a piece of ourselves. And we wonder, will I ever be whole again? Will I ever feel truly alive again? Those are legitimate questions. There is an answer. Yes, we can feel whole again. We can carry the memory of our loved ones with...

We read about stages of grief and cycles of grief as though there were one pattern into which all of our experiences must fit. I think, instead of stages and cycles, we should think of grief as an onion. We peel back one layer as we are able to do so. Under that layer is...

I know that my situation is uncommon. My parents and I lived together. I had the luxury of time to prepare to sort their things in the house we shared. I know that, for some, an apartment must be cleared and surrendered quickly. Even when that is the case, it is possible to box up...

A year ago, an internal flood damaged three rooms in my home. It took six months for the contractors to complete their work. Then began my work to reconstruct the way my home “should” look after the renovation and reconstruction were complete. I am still working on that project. In April I moved an antique...

John 11:32-37 (NIV) When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.”  When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit...

I have always been taught to maintain emotional discipline, and never to show emotions. Perhaps it is that Vulcan ancestor. (Wink!) To cry in public was always considered a sign of weakness and that was not acceptable in my family. So, I learned that tears were bad, shameful, and inappropriate. When my parents died, I...

For some of us, our great loss was accompanied by financial uncertainty, because they had failed to plan. My parents never made an estate plan. They believed there was no rush until one day there was no more time. I am grateful that my brother and I were able to come to an agreement and...

It has taken me five years to begin to believe this, but it is true; it takes courage to ask for help. We want to be independent. We want to be strong. We do not want to be seen as needy or fragile. So, we try to do everything for ourselves. We hide our needs...